Darth Vader Attends City Council Meeting to Praise Flock Cameras: “Surveil the Rebel Scum”

There is skillful trolling, and then there’s this truly anti-heroic commitment to the bit. We have to applaud the gentleman who apparently decided it was worth the trip on a San Diego bus line while dressed as Darth Vader in order to make a satirical point about Flock cameras and our ever-growing American surveillance state: Well done, anonymous nerd. You crushed it.

The venue: A San Diego City Council meeting, where members of said council were hearing public comment on a wide array of hot-button issues, including the nation’s seething, increasingly bipartisan hatred of Flock cameras, which have been implicated in a wide array of abuses from local law enforcement using them for all kinds of illegal activity, like stalking random women. Of course, Flock cameras are also being used by police for perfectly legal profiling and invasion of privacy as well, such as being used as justification to pull someone over just because they were photographed driving to a state where recreational cannabis is legal.

But the real question on everyone’s mind at said meeting was no doubt: “How does burnt up husk of Anakin Skywalker feel about all this?” And buddy, Vader let ’em know just how much he and his Emperor love being able to keep tabs on rebel scum. The anonymous fellow was addressed exclusively as “Darth Vader” for the night, and you can literally hear his ominous breathing as he trundles up to the podium to deliver a stirring address. It’s a rare video where the delivery is nearly as good as the premise. Just look at the people in the immediate background, cracking up. Positively wholesome.

“The Emperor is a fan of Flock, and we must continue utilizing Flock technologies so that we can follow and surveil the rebel scum as they move from playground to playground; from playground to pool; from pool to gymnasium,” said “Vader,” in reference to reports of Flock cameras being installed in places where there aren’t even cars to monitor. “Because we all know that the Flock cameras are not only following the license plate readers, they are following children. They are following children in parks and gymnasiums. And we need this. I need this so I can stalk my ex-girlfriend.”

Funny though this no doubt may be, it bears mentioning that this fellow was by no means some kind of single-issue Dark Lord of the Sith. He also went up to the microphone on other occasions during the same meeting to speak on everything from storm drain cleaning, to ICE detention centers, to an anti-homeless ban on camping, while remaining entirely in character, right down to the vaguely British accent. But he often circled back to Flock cameras, saying: “This technology will help us find Luke Skywalker as he traverses the universe in his X-Wing.”

“We do not need parks,” the armored man continued. “We do not need libraries. We do not need daycare centers. We do not need homeless shelters. All we need is money for our stormtroopers. And anyone that disagrees is part of the rebel alliance and scum, and they should be taken away immediately.”

Meanwhile, back in our own galaxy, the anti-Flock sentiment certainly seems to be spreading like wildfire, to the point that some cities are trying to get away with canceling their Flock contracts and just replacing those automated license plate readers (ALPRs) with similar cameras from a different brand without so much negative name recognition, hoping this will get the activists off their backs. You can probably predict just how popular those decisions have been.

If anything, the hatred of Flock and the way it has come to exemplify mass surveillance has now given rise to a new breed of vigilante folk hero, in the form of people tampering with or outright destroying the cameras. A man fitting that description was arrested just this week in Kentucky after police say he shot a Flock camera with a gun. Upon searching his residence, detectives found five more destroyed Flock cameras that he had gathered, seemingly as trophies.

Rebel scum, indeed. What would Darth Vader think?

Darth Vader 🤝 Flock cameras

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— The Contrarian (@contrariannews.org) 6:02 PM · Aug 20, 2026